Everyone else around you is more concerned about how THEY look, than the way YOU look.
People get self-conscious when they get a pimple on their face, or when they’re having a bad hair day. I still do, all the time. But a lot of people don’t realize that everyone has their own insecurities, and there’s a good chance no one even noticed that your hair isn’t as straight and smooth today as it was yesterday. Don’t stress the little things. Most of the time, they’re only temporary.
My mom did a lot more for me than I thought she did.
As a single parent, she took care of my brother and I so well that I didn’t think twice about how hard it could have been for her. She did so much cleaning, cooking, driving us around, paying bills, and more. She did it all. Even though I’m able to tell her all of this now, I wish I would have told her at the time how much I appreciated her. It might’ve helped her get through the difficult times knowing that I was noticing her hard work.
Don’t stress about the friends that aren’t really your friends.
People will come and go throughout your life, and unfortunately some of those people will be ones that you once called friends. As a teenager/young adult, I think it can be hard for a lot of people to realize this. Sometimes it’s just not worth putting time and effort into someone that doesn’t do the same for you in return. As a result of this, people will drift apart. That doesn’t necessarily mean it’s anyone’s fault! Or, maybe sometimes it does. I wish I had known when to stop trying and caring about someone that didn’t want to give me their time and effort. Sometimes it’s just not meant to be!
There are (usually) many opportunities that come along for you to make friends, you just don’t always take them.
As someone who is fairly shy and introverted, it took me a long time to realize this. I have close friends who have a ton of their own friends that they’ve met through college, work, etc. Sometimes I wonder why I don’t have as many friends as others. But then I realize, it’s no one’s fault but my own. I’ve turned down a number of opportunities to hang out with coworkers outside of work, get coffee with a classmate, and so on. I guess at the time it didn’t seem important to me. If you’re okay with that, great! If not, it’s never too late to get out there and meet some awesome people.
You don’t have to try hard to “fit in” if you don’t want to.
Ever heard of FOMO? For those that haven’t, it stands for Fear Of Missing Out, and it happens to a lot of us. Throughout high school I’d see people going to parties and having fun. I thought these things sounded exciting for the sole reason that everyone else was doing them. While it does suck to miss out on things, it’s also important to do what is best for you. I’ve learned how to say no if I simply don’t feel like going to a crazy party and would rather stay home and watch movies instead. Sure, I’m missing out on an opportunity to spend time with my friends, but I’m still putting myself and my needs first. “Fitting in” can sound nice, but it’s not always practical or necessary. Don’t get me wrong though. I still love to go out and socialize, just not all day every day. For me, balance is key!
What are some things you wish you could tell your younger self? I’d love to hear them.
As always, thanks for reading!